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Wednesday, November 2, 2011

How to attract love

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The weapon to use in attracting someone is to use that which is most attractive about you. Perhaps you have missed this point all this time.

Your capacity to love is the most attractive thing about you.
A part of you may reject this. A part of you may not even like these words. 

Yet, all around you there are people yearning for love. It is what most people want the most. Why not improve your ability to create good relationships by improving your ability to feel and express what most people want? 

Do you want to find love? Well, for a start, don't wait till the perfect partner comes along. Love is not like trying to catch a fish. We don't catch love; we grow it. Your ability to love is right inside you. 

People want to see that you can love them as the imperfect humans that they are. How will they do that? By seeing how you love your own imperfections. 

We treat those who get close to us the same way that we treat ourselves. People instinctively know this. You can ascertain how the other person will treat us by seeing how kind, or otherwise, they are to themselves. We are either attracted or repelled depending on whether this matches with how well we treat ourselves. 

We attract people who have the same capacity to love that we have. 

Are you a harsh judge of yourself? Are you your own worst critic? Do you even pride yourself in this? Then that is your greatest imperfection for it is your greatest barrier to love. 

How to love other people despite their imperfections? The answer is simple. Start learning to love your own imperfections. Learn to love the needy parts, the greedy parts, the negative parts. Take those parts of you in hand with firmness, yet with kindness. Of course, you can be smart about it too and use whatever helps you on your way. 

You know that Big Bad Secret you keep? The one you don't want anyone to find out about? The one that you believe is unique to you? Everyone has that! (Well, maybe not everyone but lots of people for sure). Don't be so arrogant as to assume you are worse than everyone else. 

Courage is a quality of the heart. For it takes courage to face the best and the worst within us, within our relationships and within our lives. Without courage there can be no love for there is always a risk, or at least the illusion of a risk, in stepping deeper into love. 

What is more attractive than love? Nothing. Stay true to your capacity to love and you stay true to the best in yourself and the best in the world. Do you want less than this? 

You will also then stand the best possible chance of bringing that hunk/babe you so dearly want into your life. You will also be in the best position to make the most of it when you do. 

How to attract love? Not by making that your goal. Make becoming more loving your goal. 

By becoming more loving more love will be coming to you.

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