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Friday, December 23, 2011

When a Man Is Emotionally Unavailable

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re you always trying to connect emotionally with your man? Do his feelings seem locked up somewhere deep inside of him when he is with you? Do you feel like you are ALWAYS trying to get his attention so that he can pay you some attention? Is this a guy thing or is your man emotionally unavailable? What are the common signs that a man is emotionally unavailable?
1. He has no real desire to be around you. A man who is emotionally unavailable also tends to be physically unavailable all the time. He may be in the same room or even sitting right next to you on the settee but his hands, eyes and body never engage with you. He may go through the motions of living like eating; answering your questions with single answers; having sex and doing whatever you ask in the home. But he will not have any real interest in you and he will not cuddle, or hug you or touch you lightly as he talks. His interaction with you gives you the eerie feeling that he is thousands or even million of miles away from you, even when he is sitting or lying right next to you.
2. He has no interest in the things that are uniquely you or in issues that concern you. A man that is emotionally unavailable is living on automatic, much like a robot. He functions by doing the minimal that he can in his relationship with you. He will not really be interested in your life and its unique twists and turns. He may get involved if you harass and nag him into action but generally it is an uphill task getting him involved in 'your' things. He may respond when you tell him about your day but if you pay attention to him, his body and replies you can almost hear them screaming their total disinterest in all that concerns you.
3. Your conversations are confined to the mundane life stuff. When a man is emotionally unavailable to you he talks to you about non-issues. He talks only when he must and he does not talk about himself or the things that are dear to his heart and life. Instead he will talk about the weather, the traffic or other such life stuff; and how it was, without telling you how it affected him or made him feel. He will talk like one who is an outside observer in his life. His lack of emotional connection with you will make his conversation more like a commentary... like it happened but not to him as he has no feelings about it that he cares enough to share with you.
4. Nothing about you and your life together gives him joy and happiness. An emotionally unavailable man will not find you a source of pleasure. He may not be completely unhappy but episodes of sheer delight and pleasure with you will be rare or non-existent... and you will know it.
5. He is an emotionally dead man only when he is around you! A man that is emotionally unavailable to you will behave like an emotionally dead man around you only. When he is around other people he will be animated and engaged; and he will actually seem like a different man emotionally. He will be passionate, engaged and happy around them. Do not believe the lie that it is because he has known the other people longer etc. The truth is that he is not emotionally available to you!
These signs in combination with your intuition will let you know whether or not your man is emotionally unavailable to you. When you know that your man is emotionally unavailable the next stage will be understood why he is disconnected emotionally from you. He may be going through a life crisis or he may just want out of the relationship.

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