Remember to check back for a new topic

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Romance's Secret Revealed

Bookmark and Share
If you have ever wanted to know the true secrets of romance, then this is your lucky day. I am going to reveal the foundational concepts that will allow you to become the romantic person your partner has dreamed of. These concepts will make romance part of your normal life. The rewards are too many to mention, but I will say that your relationship will be the envy of everyone else. But I warn you, if you follow these guidelines, both of your libidos will likely shoot through the roof. You may want to consult a doctor to make sure you are healthy enough for a romantic lifestyle.
To make it as simple as possible, I have taken the most critical concepts of romance and formulated a four step program that is easy to follow. The main secret of romance is LOVE. Yes,  that would be easy to remember. LOVE is Listen, Observe, Vision, and Express. If you can make those four concept groups part of your everyday life with your loved one, then you will automatically be the most romantic person your sweetheart has ever known.
Whenever you are talking with your partner, you should intently listen. Make them the most important thing at that moment. And don't just listen, pay attention. People will tell others what they want or need if people would just listen. If you are at a loss for what your partner wants, then you just aren't listening. Turn off the TV if you need, and just listen. By listening to what people say, it shows a sincere concern and interest in that person. And that is why listening is one of the core secrets to romance. Romance is the act of making someone special, feel special. If you aren't listening to your mate, then it is possible that someone else will. Listen for the clues that will make them smile, and respond to those clues whenever possible (but not at that moment of course). When you remember what someone says, and you show them day after day that you remember what they said, then they will appreciate and respect you.
Observe what your partner does on a regular basis. How do they make their tea, what is their morning routine, how do they like to relax, etc? Observation and listening go hand in hand. A romantic person will know their lover very well. Does your sweetheart routinely forget the towel before his shower, and has to run to the closet to get one? Then when he goes to the shower, be there with the towel when he gets out. Bring his morning coffee just the way he likes it so when he gets out of his morning shower, it is there on the dining waiting for him. By observing your loved one, you will be able to know who they are, and that is a key secret to a romantic person. Remember, romance is not about grand things, it is about continual small things that show someone special just how special they are. Nothing shows that better than listening and observing enough to be able to do things for them. By the time you make it a habit of listening and observing, you will have already begun to experience a major increase in romantic libido on both of you. You may even be smooching and other things like you did in the very beginning.
While not as important as listening and observing, the visual appearance of both of you will play a role in how important your partner is to you. I know that it is nice to come home, relax, and get comfy after work. The visual aspect of a relationship is important too. By taking the time to look good for your loved one, shows them that you want to look good for them; which will translate into how much you care and value them. It is a very subconscious thing, but the subconscious mind is very powerful over time. A really interesting thing about trying to look good for your partner is that they will also want to look good for you. And yes, this is a definite libido enhancer too. Vision also relates to your physical health. Make some time for you to work out in some way. Not only will this show your partner that you care about yourself and your appearance, but it will make you feel better about yourself too. When you feel good about yourself, others will know it, and feel that charismatic pull to you.
Expressing yourself is important in a relationship because it shows that you trust that person. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable to your loved one allows any walls or obstacles that would otherwise keep you apart. Expressing your emotions allows your partner to take part in your life and to always know what is going on with you. It makes them feel love for you, and loved by you. Men, you can still be their superman, and express sadness or any other emotion. Remember that Superman told Lois Lane his weakness which showed trust. Trust in a relationship allows romance to bloom.
So remember LOVE equals Romance!

Friday, May 27, 2011

Emotional Intimacy! How Important?

Bookmark and Share
Emotional intimacy evolves while you along with your significant other reveal how you feel to one another. When you two talk about your inner thoughts and feelings, the other lovingly listens while offering support. When your emotional intimacy develops, you can expect to start experiencing a more substantial connection in your partnership.

Unfortunately, sharing comparable experiences on its own will not create the kind of life-long closeness emotional intimacy should bring to your partnership. Sharing adventures and experiences are great but you should be able to easily share your thoughts and your feelings about those activities and experiences also. Your feelings are internal and personal part of an individual. The only way that your companion can comprehend these inner thoughts and feelings is when you share them openly with them. For instance, I am sure that you and your best friends speak about the way each of you feel about the things which matter to you in your life. I am also confident that you all respond supportively to one another. The emotional intimacy that is present between you and your friends helps to keep your relationship special and solid.
Emotional intimacy won't take place in your partnership if you ever:
Forcing your companion to discuss their emotions and opinions with you. This can never work and eventually backfires. If you wish to experience an emotional intimacy with your partner, you simply must exercise patients. It can often times be challenging to share their feelings and their deep opinions with others -- including the ones they are most comfortable with. Try to produce a safe and comfortable atmosphere for your partner. This helps them to feel that it can be acceptable for them to express their emotions to you.
Both of you primarily discuss circumstances however, you do not ever take a look at your emotions relating to the situations. Don't get me wrong, dealing with stuff that transpired during the day or things in your encounters you have experienced is an extremely wonderful and nourishing factor. But in order to build up emotional intimacy with someone it's essential to likewise reveal your feelings and inner most thoughts. This will help to make that long-lasting and trustworthy bond which every person hopes for.
You assume your mate will share their emotions to you. Sure, it's alright to want your companion to express themselves. It's totally natural to want to share your feelings with your partner. Although not all people enjoy doing this. If you would like your companion to share their feelings and thoughts with you, don't expect it or demand it. Sooner or later, eventually they will come around. By trying to force him or her into it you may develop anger and disrespect towards each other as opposed to the emotional intimacy that you long for.
You share all of your intimate feelings and thoughts with too many people. This completely diminishes the worth of the intimacy of your feelings. What happens to a secret once you've shared it with everyone? The secret is not a secret anymore. This holds true for your intimate feelings. Share intimate feelings and thoughts with your partner and not with everyone you know. Your relationship will become stronger and closer if you do this.
It is important to develop emotional intimacy in your relationship. Practice sharing your feelings and thoughts with your partner in order to grow closer. All the best!

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Barriers In A Relationship

Bookmark and Share

When we are in a close relationship with another person, sometimes we can feel the walls between each other. Sometimes, one of us may be trying to protect ourselves or hiding what we really are from the other person. After a while, this behavior becomes normal and thus is prolonged. If you have been in a relationship for a while, yet still feel like you haven't connected fully to the other person, there could be a reason. First, look at yourself. Are you trying to protect yourself because of something that has happened in your past? This may seem obvious, but still one may be doing it on an unconscious level.
Our past hangs on when it is connected to our fears. If we fear being hurt, left, or without control, we try to hide from it, and thus we are hiding from the other person. The distance could be there because we have not fully opened ourselves up to the relationship. If you believe there is nothing holding you back, no behaviors or feelings, then perhaps it is the other person. When you look at this other person, what do you know of their past? Have they been hurt before and are they still holding onto that fear? With honesty, one can approach each other. It is important to feel close in a relationship, and by talking about this, you enable this feeling. By approaching this subject, you can learn if the other person feels distant from you too.
How they feel about you may be why you feel distant from them. It could be as simple as this. But if you dig deeper and ask if they feel they are protecting themselves from something in the past, you might understand them better. Share how you feel about your past relationships. Talk about being open, not just in what you say to each other, but in how you feel with each other. Practice being open within and feeling acceptance towards this other person. The more we let go of fear in a relationship, the more open we become. If we fear our past repeating itself, we are not fully in the relationship we are in right now. Focus on being open if you really desire no barriers between each other. Help yourself get past the walls by letting yours go first. Remember, if you feel a distance, sometimes just taking the first step enables the other to let go and open up too.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Do You Know What He Wants?

Bookmark and Share
What does this mean for women who are having difficulty with their relationship or who have recently broken up?
Basically, women think men have affairs with their secretary, woman at work or someone they meet when they are out because they are "Hot" or "Younger" or that the other woman has physical attributes that they themselves don't have or lack. This is not what your man is looking for and not what your man wants.
A man wants to be noticed, if he is having an affair it's because he is craving attention, admiration and, quite frankly, wants to be loved.
When at home, men, as a rule, tend to feel nagged, moaned at and criticised. At work, he is important. He is respected for his abilities, recognised as being important. At home, unless his partner recognises his needs, he becomes invisible, and sees no reason why he should take out the rubbish, wash up the dishes etc this is not what he thinks (Even if he does say we are all equal) a man should be doing. This is not what your man wants.
Show him you care
If a man is not respected at home, not admired, not noticed, he becomes an easy target for any woman who makes him feel attractive, respected and most importantly, wanted. Do you want your man, do you still love him, and do you really want to know what your man wants and how to keep him.
Cloak him in your armour
When a woman makes her man feel wanted and admired she cloaks him in her own "Anti mistress" armour. This is because most men would do almost anything to keep his queen. The woman he dreams of and he knows will stand by him if he falls in battle.
The workplace is a battlefield
Don't underestimate today's workplace, it's as much a battlefield for your man as any battlefield of the past. He fights every day to bring home the wages to pay the bills and to make a quality life for his woman and himself. Ultimately, what your man wants is to be your hero.
If you really want to know what your man wants, it's you. You when you first met, when you admired him, loved him and showed it. Is your relationship a bit stale? Are you showing him the attention you showed when you first met, do you still admire him, do you still want him?
If you answer yes to the questions above, you need to think about your part in the relationship. Ask yourself, are you prepared to do the following:
· Show him respect.
· Pay him the attention he wants'
· Admire him for who he is, not who you want him to be
· Be there for him when he needs you, even if he has difficulty asking for help
If you are prepared to do the above, you will be giving your man what he wants'. If you are not,  someone else will.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

These 3 Ranked Top Among The Reasons Why Men Are Afraid of Commitment

Bookmark and Share
To be absolutely honest we all have some fear or apprehension about committing to somebody else. Just think about all the horror stories you hear, all the things that could go wrong and the future begins to look like a frightening, unexplored place where monsters can jump you. So what are the top reasons why men are afraid of commitment?
1. His current knowledge about commitment. Having lived this long your man will have encountered commitment situations that are unhappy, demeaning or hellish. He may have come out of a committed relationship that was unhappy and demeaning and this will color his perspective and make him wary of commitment. A man who has been bitten in the past will be afraid of commitment. What he has been exposed to in his family and through the lives of his friends and in the media in their committed relationships will obscure his view point on commitment! If the committed relationships around him have been characterized by pain and misery then he may be afraid of that happening to him. If he seems unwilling to commit to you find out how his past has been and that of those who are significant in his life. If most of it is miserable then your pushing will just drive him away. Be understanding of his experiences and finds ways to encourage him beyond this commitment road block.
2. He will be trapped. Nothing frightens a man more than being trapped in a situation that is not working but which he cannot get out of. Being in a casual relationship is so much easier since he can do pretty much what he likes and when things don't work out he can always leave. Men like to have the option to leave and so they are afraid of commitment as it makes leaving that much harder. To overcome this fear a man needs to love you so much that he is willing to give up that freedom. If he will not commit to you it may because he does not love you enough to give up his freedom or his fear is so big that it overpowers his love for you and he may need your encouragement and help in order to overcome it.
3. Things may not work out. The future is uncertain and a man knows that a committed relationship has a 50% chance of failing and he really would prefer to avoid something that he will fail at and which will consume his time and energy. Again his fear of failure may paralyze him and render him petrified of commitment. You need wisdom to show him that commitment to you has a very good chance of succeeding because you don't have traits or behavior that will make him miserable. A man who likes you as you are and he will often believe that you will stay just the way you are and you need to be real in your relationship with him so that he can get to know the real you. And have some assurance that you will not change on him overnight. Resist the temptation to pretend to like or dislike things and behaviors but be who you really are.

Men are afraid of commitment due to these 3 factors and you need to understand your man's particular fear so that you can help him manage or reduce it.
Water for Elephants

Monday, May 23, 2011

Improving the Quality of Your Love Life Using Nature

Bookmark and Share
Do you love nature? I mean getting out, taking photos, traveling?
Every moment you separate from that can be torture. I mean, most of the happiest people you meet live or work in nature, so why not you?
Over 3.5 billion people live in cities on this planet. Most crave nature. Some escape into their sport or garden to experience it for a few moments a day, but is that enough?
Statistics show, we're becoming less and less happy and doing more and more crazy stuff to deal with it. I mean, do you really think sitting behind a computer screen or mobile phone is going to nourish your soul like a walk in nature? I don't think so.
So what to do?
Sea change... Hill change... Retirement to a life sitting around worrying about nothing is not an option. It drives most people nuts, or at the least, to trivia.
So, where do we go? We classically go to TV.
We're escaping more and more into virtual reality, and this is great, an alternative reality to one devoid of nature is better than a reality constantly stressed... But it's still not nature, and it's still not ideal.
Take a sad person to nature and they're still sad. Take an in the head corporate person to nature and they're still talking about yesterday or tomorrow. Just because we go on holiday or go out into nature it doesn't mean we're going to relax and absorb it. No, nature doesn't bend our arm and say, "TURN UP."...
So, it's not so much the being in nature that makes the difference, actually, it doesn't make a huge difference. What makes a difference is how we think in nature.
The wonderful thing about this discovery is that we can bring nature with us. If it's a way of thinking that nature causes and creates happiness, why not package it.
Here are a few suggestions so you can import nature into your heart and mind and therefore take it anywhere.
Don't be self righteous. 
The self righteous person is absolutely disconnected to nature.( only you is right no other person ) There are two sides, balance, in nature, self righteousness is a half truth, imbalanced personality. Don't be self righteous, have an opinion but think twice before you speak.
Be grateful.
The thankful person is not selective about what they thank. Selective thankfulness is poison because it's covering unthankfulness about other stuff. Instead, find the blessings in everything that happens and try to be thankful even when it's not what you wanted.
Generosity is karmic. One can't give enough but all giving done with a return in mind is discounted giving. Generosity means to give more than you get. If someone pays you for one hour, give them two. If someone gives you kindness give them three in return. Give more than you get, without hope of repayment, simply earn the reward of generosity and you'll be in nature.
To be yourself, think for yourself. One can easily become a robot in a world designed to make everyone the same as everyone. To be creative, think for yourself. All organized religions, consumer ideas and brands are designed to kill creativity and birth conformity. To be creative one doesn't have to reject mass consciousness one can simply be thankful for it, and, at the same time, question it.
 Don't be afraid to love, it's like generosity, the more you do, the better you'll be connected to nature. 

Sunday, May 22, 2011

The Difference Between Having Sex and Making Love

Bookmark and Share

Personally I like the fact that you can have sex or make love depending on your circumstances and how you feel. I don't believe for one minute that being completely in love with your partner automatically puts you into the 'love making' bracket every time you have sex. It's not that easy.
Some people would argue and say that 'making love' is just a polite way of saying 'sex' - both acts involve the same physical contact and both acts work towards the same outcome. That may be so, but there are huge differences between the two and to be honest, until you truly make love you may always think they're the same. So, in order to appreciate and experience the art of true love you must first understand the needs and desires of your own body.

Here's why...

Sex can be superficial whether you're male or female - a means to an end to help satisfy a sexual urge. For some it can be unromantic and quick; regular activity every Friday or Saturday night. For others it can be exciting, naughty and extremely horny; depending on whom you're with and how you feel. However, making love is completely different, it is almost impossible to make love to a stranger (unless you're one of the lucky ones). But, remember making love is all about understanding - understanding your own needs and that of your lover. So before you can tell someone exactly what it is you enjoy sexually, you must embark on a journey of self-discovery. 

So what's the difference?

Sex can be experienced with casual partners or one night stand. It can be experienced with a stranger, a prostitute or during an affair. It's what you have at the start of a new relationship and often in a long-term relationship. There are no set rules.

In casual sex you throw all inhibitions out of the window and put your own desires first. Sex with a regular partner or lover helps to build self-confidence as you experiment with techniques, role play. If you embark on an affair, provided both parties agree that it's just 'sex', the relationship can last over a period of time and you can enjoy some fantastic raunchy sex. It's when it becomes more than just 'sex' and strong emotions start to become involved that complications arise.

So what about sex in a marriage?

Sex is crucial in a marriage if you want to keep the marriage alive. It plays a huge part in its success. It can be the difference between looking outside of the marriage for sexual satisfaction and not. Too often though, life takes over and before you know it, you stop making love. Your only romantic liaison may be a quick romp under the bed covers on a Friday night with the lights turned off. Sound familiar?

Remember, making love is far more unique than having sex. Anyone can have sex, but not everyone can make love.

So how will you know?

You will know when you have experienced true love for the first time; no amount of reading or explanation will be able to tell you exactly at what point this will happen. But making love is usually slower, softer and much more intimate than sex; there is no race towards the finishing line. Your full attention and focus is centred on each other's needs and desires. There are no barriers, no shyness and no holding back. The passion is raw yet you are completely at ease in each other's arms as you slowly build to intense, knee trembling orgasms. You are on an emotional high and the feeling of euphoria is second to none.

So, yes some would say that making love is just like sex; physical, fun and passionate, but without a true understanding of each other's sexual needs you cannot make love and unless both parties feel the same towards each other, you cannot make love. However, I believe that you can be in a long-term relationship, or just madly in love and still enjoy both with your partner and let's be honest, if you can have sex and make love with your partner, then consider yourself very lucky indeed.

If you can't, try harder!