Remember to check back for a new topic

Saturday, August 20, 2011

You Can Make a Man Fall in Love and Commit

Bookmark and Share

ou spotted him and connected with him and you really do like him; and now you want to conquer him and get him to fall in love with you and commit to you. Does that summarize your current state? If so what does it take to make a man fall in love and commit to you?
Ø A vision of your desired reality. What is it that you really want? If you are not sure about what it is that you want then you are unlikely to get it. A vague mushy vision will not work since you want to be motivated to do what is required to get what you want and to be able to know when and if you are making progress. So sit down for a second and decide in as precise terms as possible what your desired outcome is. What does his 'falling in love' with you look like to you? What does a commitment to you look like? Be as specific and as detailed as you can so that you know well what it is that you want from him.
Ø Make a plan! Cold as this sounds you must make a plan to get a man to fall in love and commit to you as left to his own devices he may just never get a clue or he may get a clue and for some reason do nothing about it. To get what you desire you need to be pro-active even if you want to do it in a subtle manner.
*   What do you need to do? You want him to not just fall in love with you but to take it a step further and commit to you so yours is a balancing act of holding his emotions while also creating a need in him to commit to you. This is really hard to do. To get him to fall in love with you requires him to see all your great physical and inner qualities (available) but for him to commit to you he needs to believe that you are precious and rare. So depending on you and the man that you like, you need to do what works for both of you but remember that he is not like you so too much of you will not motivate him to commit to you. You must give him room to appreciate who you are and to realize how important you are to him.
*   Start now! Procrastination is never a friend so start today to get him to fall in love with you. Make it a point to dress to show off your great attributes, be interested and interesting and have a life.
*   Monitor your progress. Since you know what you want you need to periodically take stock to see if you are making progress or not and to adapt your plan to the changing reality. If your plan is not working so that he is still not showing any additional romantic interest in you then you must find out why your plan is not working and then make the necessary adjustments.
Ø Stick to your plan! It may take time for your plan to bear all the fruits that you want so you need the ability to stick at your plan. This does not of course mean that you should deny reality. If you made progress initially and then he lost all interest you must find out what happened and remedy it. Be honest with yourself as self denial will not get him to fall in love with you. Keep working those parts of your plan that are working.
To make a man fall in love with you assumes that the man has some attraction towards you and you are only enhancing and directing that attraction. If he has no romantic interest in you then you can work at lighting his attraction but if his attraction toward you cannot be lit then whatever you do may not get any response from him. 

Friday, August 19, 2011

You Can Prevent Premature Ejaculation

Bookmark and Share

t takes most people a lifetime to realize that they can prevent premature ejaculation. Do you know that almost every man suffers from premature ejaculation? Unless you aren't achieving orgasm until your partner instructs you to, then you are not lasting long enough. Making sure that you learn to control your body is the most important step in the process of learning how to last as long as you would like, and most people find that the practice involved is stimulating and enjoyable. Read on to learn the two best ways to prevent premature ejaculation from ruining your relationship.
There are two situations you might be in that can cause premature ejaculation to be a problem for you. The first is that you are new to intercourse and haven't had the experience needed to build up your stamina. The second is that you might be in a relationship where you aren't able to work with your partner as often as you would like. These two situations require the most effort to prevent premature ejaculation and will be the focus of this article.
v Practising to last longer with your partner will go a longer way in helping you achieve your purpose. You will find that within a few weeks you are lasting longer and longer. It's a process that is super fun to go through and your partner will really enjoy it.
v If you are new to intercourse, there isn't much you are going to be able to do except practice. If you are with a woman for the first time your body will kick into overdrive. It has been waiting for as many as 20 years (and sometimes longer) for the opportunity to ejaculate into a vagina. And this is what pushes you over the edge so fast. You have to make sure you are prepared to work through the process of getting used to being with a woman. This is the best way to prevent premature ejaculation in this scenario: practice.
You will notice a trend. Everything revolves around practice. What most men realize is that they don't get enough practice. But when they realize they have a problem, they get shy and stop trying. And this just exacerbates the problem. If you are struggling to hold it back as long as possible, then you want to make sure you get all the practice you can. When you are with your partner, you have to keep working at it to build the stamina and longevity that you really need. Most people won't realize this until it's too late.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

The smallest deed!

Bookmark and Share

he smallest deed is better than the greatest intention. - John Burroughs
How many times have you intended to do something wonderful to show the love of your life that they are amazing? How many times did you carry out your plans? If you’re like most people, not that often.
The appeal of John Burroughs' quote is that it is the small things that are more likely to be accomplished. Little deeds of love really count. Taking the time to notice what someone is wearing and then offering a positive comment can serve relationships well. So can remembering a birthday or anniversary. Bringing them a glass of water when you see them working hard or touching them sweetly as the pass by are other examples of small and meaningful deeds.
Small deeds add up to a great body of work. The great intentions don't usually occur or get expressed. Think of the people you care the most about and their behaviour that led to your caring about them. Most were small deeds or words.
Frequent and small acts of love and affection change the landscape of our relationships. I see so many couples that don't have those loving small habits. They love each other, but don't express it or show it except in some grand way a few times a year.
Interestingly, these same couples can show love and affection for their children. They often tell that their parents didn't show them much so they vowed to show their children they are loved and thought about. Yet, many still contend that because they never saw their parents show affection, use endearing names, or small gifts, they don't feel comfortable doing so with their spouse.
It's as if they think they can continue to act as their parents did and not have the same disasters. They act as if it costs them some great price to bring home flowers, a card, to walk in and hug one another. I am amazed how much resistance people have to changing this with simple small acts.
Small deeds of love don't cost much and surely you will never run out of affection. If you are uncomfortable starting this, try to do it in small steps. The discomfort goes away the more you practice it.
The big acts of love are great. I want as many of those as I can give or gather. Still, it's the little loving acts and words that warm and comfort us. It's always good to know you are loved. The more often it’s said and shown, the happier we are.
A light and persistent effort in small deeds builds up good will that helps us continue when times are tough.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Digital Age Worry

Bookmark and Share

here is something exhilarating, relaxing, and profoundly satisfying about trusting your partner. And yet, in these increasingly high-tech lives of ours, trust seems more elusive than ever.
How do you know he is not secretly sexting with someone he met online? Can you be sure she is not flirting with her high school sweetheart on Facebook chat?
Especially since the Anthony Weiner sexting scandal in June of 2011, a great deal of discussion has taken place, and a flurry of articles has been published about infidelity in the digital age.
According to research by Buss and Shackelford, 30 to 60% of married individuals in the U.S. will engage in infidelity during their marriage. Given the wide variety of relatively private modes of communication offered by digital devices today (texting, chatting, email...), a growing number of affairs are occurring or starting online. Are you worried that cyber-infidelity will wreck your relationship, too?
Learn to Trust Your Partner
Living with worry and mistrust is no way to live. Here are 5 things to consider that can help unlock your worries and create more trust in your relationship.
1. Control is not Trust. Know Rather Than Control.
Some couples attempt to resolve the issue of mistrust by controlling each other: "I want to have your password. I need to see your screen all the time. I must know who you are messaging. Then I can relax." Not really! You never ever relax that way. You worry, control, worry, control, worry, control... Real safety is born out of real trust. Control is not air-tight.
Control is very different from trust. Instead, knowledge of your partner can be helpful. When you know who they really are, and how they might act when nobody is looking, then you can truly relax. Because the truth is, there will always be times when nobody is looking.
Get to know your partner better. Discuss your values (e.g. commitment, monogamy). Review your vows. Ask each other question. Express your needs, boundaries, or concerns, e.g. how your partner's flirting might feel; how you define cheating, could you survive infidelity?
If you know your partner, and there is something to worry about, you need to address it soon. What do you not trust? Have they lied or cheated in the past? Are they acting in unusually secretive ways? Are they suddenly avoiding intimacy with you? Do relationship issues bring distrust? If there is nothing to worry about, then relax!
Rather than control, the antidote to infidelity concerns in a mature relationship is to strengthen your relationship and develop real trust. Spend quality time together, talk more, have fun!
2. Reject Secrecy.
Secrecy involves hiding or concealing. Unlike welcome surprise gifts or birthday parties, secrecy has a deceitful quality when a partner withholds information that is important for the other partner in order to take care of themselves. Secrecy then becomes a problem, and secretive behaviour breeds greater distrust and separation.
3. Trust and secrecy cannot co-exist
When people trust their partner and feel close to them, they tend to have a natural desire to share about their day and their contact with others. They choose to be less private. If your partner is sharing less than usual, or avoids certain topics, there may be a trust issue, a personal issue, or perhaps something to hide! Either way, it may be time to communicate with your partner or does a relationship check-up. Openness is an essential element of true intimacy.
4. Online Behaviour is Different from Offline Behaviour? Think Twice.
There is much talk these days about how people behave very differently online than they do offline due to increased privacy and anonymity. And in some ways, there is some truth to that. But only to a certain point. Sooner or later, the truth about someone's character or behaviour has a way of slipping through the cracks and shining through.
5."How you do one thing is how you do everything"
Angel online, monster offline? Angel by day, monster by night? Think twice. What you see offline is what you get online. So look closer for signs. You can get clues about your partner's online behaviour by noticing their offline personality. Is your partner impulsive, flirtatious with others offline, or attentive to you? See what is there, not what you want to see. Believe your observations. Trust your intuition. Get a reality check.
In a nutshell: Practice regular communication and nurture your relationship. A close, healthy relationship is a good protection against infidelity.

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

How Compatible?

Bookmark and Share

Finding someone compatible isn't as hard as it might seem. There are about twelve major life areas to consider when you think about how compatible you are together.
There are two that top my list: life routines and feelings. All are attainable, but not always easy.
1. Life routines cover how you spend your time each day and how it differs from the way s/he spend theirs. If you both enjoy doing most things together - shopping, eating out, seeing movies, and reading the same types of books, you're ahead of a lot of people who think they found someone compatible because they like the package but haven't really examined what they need instead of what they want.
Are your sleeping patterns and arrangements similar or - is s/he an early riser, full of pep and you aren't, you enjoy sleeping in and starting your day slow, quiet, a cup of tea before you want to even get to 'good morning.'
2. Emotions, those feelings we live with, are always there - your feelings and how you share them with each other will either bring you closer together or open a chasm - are you free to express how you feel, what you're thinking and why? This is huge when you're trying to find someone compatible to live with long-term.
Often heard is the lament, 'he never gives me time' or 'she doesn't pay any attention,' There's this thing about talking, hearing, and listening.
Talking to each other - rather than, talking at each other; hearing the words; seeing the looks, and paying attention with respect; listening with an open mind and heart, and then working together to accomplish great things together - that's a compatible relationship.
Remember, your relationship isn't a play - it's your life in progress. Begin at the beginning to establish it the way you want it to be. There's nothing worse than being miserable when a little planning could create bliss.

Monday, August 15, 2011

3 simple things you can stop doing today

Bookmark and Share

There are number of basic errors that men make with women.
All of them stem from the same insecurity 'I want you to like me, and I don't believe you will think I am enough as I am'.
The aim for every man has to be to rid ourselves of this insecurity, because it tends to manifest itself in a number of ways. Here are the 3 most common:
1) Begging
Strong, masculine 'sell sell sell' director type guys suddenly become wet and spineless in the face of an attractive woman. They beg, plead and try to logically convince her to like him. They see themselves as being such 'nice guys' If this is you, it's time to get yourself a spine.
2) Buying
This is the guy who turns up in his Mercedes on the first date and whisks her off to a top restaurant for a super expensive meal. Then he'll treat her to champagne, fine chocolates, 5 star weekends in a luxurious get the idea.
You don't need to spend money on a woman in order for her to like you. Of course, it's absolutely fine to spend money on her, but remember - you do it because you want to, for your own satisfaction. It is not a requirement for getting an attractive woman to like you.
3) Bullying
The guy doesn't get what he wants from her, so tries to bully her into submission. This may take the form of just being pushy with her, or some other way. There are a number of forms this may take - so take a moment to consider if this is something you do. If so - give it up. It's not helping you.
And that's it - 3 simple things you can stop doing today, and you will automatically be ahead of 90% of other guys.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

How Strong is the Attraction?

Bookmark and Share

Attraction is a key ingredient in a relationship. When a man leaves, this ingredient has somehow gotten lost. Life can get in the way often. Stress happens, things happen in life that put outside pressures on relationships. If the attraction is lost, men often leave as opposed to working it out but why?
Men must feel like they are making you happy. The day the man feels like it's a job to make you happy, he leaves eventually. It's what makes men happy; to make the woman they love happy. If you don't assure your man that he makes you happy, you could be partly to blame. If you are a woman that complains he won't feel he is making you happy I promise. Complaining only puts distance between couples.
Many women struggle with men leaving during the early stages of dating. There are many reasons why men leave in the early stages. The main and only reason though that you should be concerned with is the fact that yes he did leave. For some reason he did not see you as girlfriend or wife material. Hard pill to swallow indeed.
Often women spend so much time analyzing why a man left. They go through it over and over in their heads and never get the right answer. My philosophy is it's ok to analyze. It will come in handy one day when you meet the right man that does not leave; you will be better able to recognize him because you won't feel the need to analyze him to death.
I would have loved to tell you that it's not you, it's him and that is why men leave, but the truth usually is it's you. There is something that reaches his core and tells him you aren't the one. Some reason his attraction fades. If this keeps happening to you, it pays to understand how attraction really works and what keeps the attraction going. It's way more than a physical thing, it's a deep emotional attraction that holds him.
The main reason why men leave is about attraction. It has started to fade. The more it fades, the more you may be feeling disconnected and this may cause you to hold on tighter or start to question and feel insecure in your relationship. This will only assure his disappearance