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Friday, January 13, 2012

Men Suffer the Pains Of a Breakup Too.

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hile it is true that men can get over relationships faster than women, it is still a pretty hard thing to deal with. The future is uncertain, you will certainly anxiously beg for her to take you back - it's just a whirlwind of emotions that affects every aspect of your life. As a matter of fact, men actually feel the same emotional toll as women do after a breakup! Men just want to make it seem as though they're strong and unaffected, but the truth is they are going through a tough time as well.
Whatever your plan is in the future, whether you want to get your girlfriend back or you want to start anew, it is necessary to do one thing: get over the breakup, and get over it fast. Now, this isn't the easiest thing to do on the planet, so I'm going to give you some guidelines on how you must think and act when it comes to your relationship and your ex. The main message is that there is still hope for your love life - you will get back the pieces of your broken heart, of that it is certain.
1) Don't over sensationalise her.
Men have this symptom where they put their exes on the pedestal and exaggerate their "loving, beautiful" nature. You must not do that if you don't want to hurt yourself. Just refrain from thinking and talking about her, and most importantly, don't commemorate the good times you had in the relationship. Don't look at photos of her, don't be sentimental with the gifts she gave you in the past... Your ex is now an unimportant part of your life, stop prioritizing and idolizing her. You may just be blinded by the pain and the loneliness of the breakup.
2) Don't be afraid to get closure.
A lot of men don't want to ultimately end the relationship because they think they still have a chance to get their ex back. This is a wrong way of thinking about breakups. Whatever you plan in the future, whether you want to take her back or you want to leave her at peace, you must get closure. Only by accepting the fact that the relationship did end will you have another clear shot at forming a brand new relationship with your ex.
3) Don't contact her.
As we are on the business of moving on, you need to detach yourself from your ex as much as possible. You will go crazy if you endlessly send her text messages or emails or voice mails and she won't respond to any of it. Really, if she wants to contact you she will find you. Trying to commence communication with her a few days after a breakup is a desperate move; she will immediately get that notion if you do it.
4) Write your feelings.
This is the most concrete way to get some emotional closure that won't have to involve talking to your ex. See, when we experience a breakup, we undergo all sorts of emotions. We can't define it, we can't express it. By writing about it, at least we can clearly grasp what we feel and therefore we will have a surer definition of how the breakup affected us. You will then have more control of your emotions, which will lead to faster recovery emotionally.
5) Exercise your newfound freedom.
There is a now a whole new plethora of possibilities you can consider, now that you're schedule has been freed quite drastically. Go get a new hobby! Learn a new sport! Mingle with new people! Do better at work! Do anything you haven't been able to do since you've been involved in the relationship with your ex. And remember, don't do this out of spite, do this because you really want to move on and receive positive vibes from other aspects of your life.

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