Lots of excitement surrounds the engagement, wedding, and honeymoon, but as the weeks, months, and years roll one into the other, that excitement can die. That is because routine often replaces the fun, connection, and excitement as time wears on.
But this does not have to be the case.
Many marriages survive because the spouses make an effort to keep the relationship fresh and important.
Here are seven tips for getting the spark back if you've lost yours:
1. Decide that the marriage is important. You and your spouse must decide what type of priority your marriage is in your day-to-day lives. If you do not make the marriage a priority, then everything else will get in the way.
2. Remember why you two got married. If you feel the day-to-day routine is crowding out your love, affection, and warm feelings for your spouse, then take some time to remember why you two got married in the first place. Then focus on building a life around that desire and interest.
3. Find something special just for the two of you. If you two never spend time alone or never engage in activities just for you, then you won't build intimacy. Intimacy and connection are both important to a healthy marriage. So find a special activity that you two enjoy and can do. And don't make it a one-off. Schedule time to engage in that activity regularly.
4. Share something personal. Think of something personal to share with your spouse. It does not have to be a big thing, but it does have to be something important to you. Take some time discussing your day, your work, your goals, etc. Be sure to listen to what your spouse is telling you. Sharing small things with each other helps to connect you.
5. Plan something special. Everyone likes to feel catered for or taken care of. Do that for your spouse. Plan a special meal, activity, event, outing, etc., designed to make your spouse feel special.
6. Talk on a regular basis. For many couples, the day-to-day demands of life are the only things they talk about. And those aren't really discussions. They are just times to check things off a list or to pass along information. Make a point to spend at least 10 minutes each day truly talking. (See point No. 4).
7. Connect on values. Discuss your spiritual beliefs and values. Use your spiritual principles to guide your choices.
You can have a fresh and interesting marriage. Use these seven tips for getting the spark back in your relationship.