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Saturday, September 15, 2012

The Fastness of Your New Relationship

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We all remember the excitement that comes along with a new relationship. We enjoy the special feelings, the anticipation of seeing the other person... and wish these thoughts and feelings would last forever. But what happens when you really get caught up in the excitement of it all and maybe lose sight of a few things? What if you then start to think it is all moving way too fast? Should you just go for it and enjoy it for all it has to offer, or do you slow it down?

There's nothing wrong with slowing things down. Your partner isn't going to think any less of you just because you want to take your time. If anything, they will respect you more for it... at least they should if they are the right one for you.

When you take "things" too quickly, you can burn out a relationship because it hasn't been given a fair chance to develop. You get in the habit of expecting things too quickly. This is an easy way to set yourself up for disappointment, and experiencing disappointment too early in a relationship isn't the best way to go.

Taking it slowly means you allow the relationship to build upon itself at a normal and acceptable rate. It allows the relationship to form a foundation which is able to be built on. It also allows for growth. Both of these areas are critical to the success of a relationship and cannot be forced. When you try to force them, they become damaged.

You also want to take your time so you can really get to know your partner. Moving too quickly in a new relationship means making decisions you might not necessarily have made if you had more knowledge about where the relationship was heading, and your partner. Knowledge comes over time.

What is another important component of a healthy relationship you build over time? Trust. Trust can't, and shouldn't, be rushed. Trust comes with experience. If you trust too quickly, you are possibly setting yourself up for being hurt. We would all love to think each partner we have is worthy of complete trust right away, but unfortunately, that isn't the case. You should always let trust build naturally and without being forced.

If you wonder if your new relationship is moving too fast, try some time apart. You should easily be able to put some space between each of you: at this stage there is no need to spend each and every waking hour together. If the relationship is healthy, the time apart won't hurt it. It will also give you alone time to reflect on the relationship, how it is really doing, where it is heading, and if it is really what you want in a relationship.

Learn about yourself... how are you really feeling about this new relationship? 
Feel free to comment, give me your opinions and discuss the mentioned issue as extensively as you wish

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